| 00:00 - 00:03 | The SIDL fixtures for next season have been published |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | We kick off with away games in Phu My Hung |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | and over in district 2 |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Followed by our first home game |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and then a KO cup game on Bui Vien, here |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Forget it, I'm not playing with you wankers any more |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Next season I'm going to play for Sheridans |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Fuhrer... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Sheridans... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Sheridans will not be playing next season |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | The team has disbanded due to lack of interest |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | All those of you who've never thrown a competitive 180, get out now |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | The greatest darts team in the history of the SIDL? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | The best fucking darts venue in the city? |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Where else can you play darts while listening to recordings of Gaelic poetry readings? |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | And the food! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Everyone loves Neil's sausage rolls |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Even I love Neil's sausage rolls, and I'm a fucking vegetarian! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Tell that fat Belgian bastard Goatburger to get his shit together, or I'll have him shot |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Sir, Herr Goetghebeur is living in Mui Ne |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Mui Ne? What the fuck is he doing in Mui Ne? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | He says he simply can't get a team together any more |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Can't get a team together? WTF? |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Even Rob Crowther can get six players together on a Tuesday |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | And he can't play darts to save his fucking life!!! |
| 01:58 - 02:00 | I remember in the good old days |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | When we would have a dozen players show up every week |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Admittedly that's only because Himmler threatened to have them shot |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | if they didn't show up on time |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | But come on, this is darts! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | What is wrong with people? |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | "Oh I can't play on Tuesday, I'm too busy" |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Busy? Don't talk to me about busy |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | I'm leader of the Third Reich |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | I'm in the middle of fighting World War 2 |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | And I haven't missed a league game since 1937!!! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Remember a couple of Tuesdays ago? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | When those Da Vincis bastards tried to blow up my bunker? |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | I still made it to the oche for 7pm |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | AND I won my fucking singles!!! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Only because he had his opponent shot after the first leg LOLZ |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Well, god knows what I'm going to do now |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I'm not playing for you bastards any more |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Goebbels hardly ever lets me play singles |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | And I can't play for Mabuhay or Los Locos |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | As I'm banned from Phattys after the incident with the Jaegermeister girl |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | I guess there's only one course of action |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I'm going to have to shoot myself. |
