| 00:01 - 00:06 | Thank you for coming on the show Mr Tomblin |
| 00:06 - 00:10 | to highlight the dangers of Strava |
| 00:10 - 00:12 | and the use of anabolic steroids in the pursuit of other riders |
| 00:14 - 00:16 | We want to help others |
| 00:16 - 00:19 | My wife and I entered in to a silly competition with a bearded cyclist |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Mary Berry ?? |
| 00:21 - 00:26 | Go on |
| 00:26 - 00:27 | Basically he goaded me |
| 00:27 - 00:32 | Initially stealing my KOM s |
| 00:32 - 00:35 | But then gaining more followers |
| 00:35 - 00:40 | and more kudos thumbs |
| 00:41 - 00:46 | Excuse me |
| 00:46 - 00:50 | But seriously .... |
| 00:50 - 00:54 | Mary Berry |
| 00:55 - 00:57 | Sorry |
| 00:58 - 01:00 | I'm sorry Steve |
| 01:01 - 01:05 | This is serious to you |
| 01:05 - 01:11 | So Mary became a real problem to you |
| 01:11 - 01:16 | Yes he did Steve became obsessed |
| 01:16 - 01:17 | I didn't sleep for weeks |
| 01:17 - 01:20 | I'd wake in the night.. Checking strava up to sixty times |
| 01:20 - 01:21 | Continually refreshing the screen |
| 01:20 - 01:23 | ..checking his profile |
| 01:23 - 01:25 | ....seeing if he'd taken any more KOMs gained any more friends |
| 01:25 - 01:27 | I thought of sabotaging certain routes |
| 01:27 - 01:39 | Throwing tacks, carpet strips |
| 01:39 - 01:43 | Super gluing gates |
| 01:43 - 01:44 | I know it's illegal but |
| 01:44 - 01:47 | He really got under my skin |
| 01:47 - 01:47 | Yes he did darling |
| 01:47 - 01:49 | He took over my life ! |
| 01:49 - 01:51 | I hate the bearded git ! |
| 01:51 - 01:54 | Excuse me but if you know Mary Berry |
| 01:54 - 01:55 | He eats pies drinks beer |
| 01:55 - 01:59 | And really doesn't give a damn |
| 01:58 - 02:04 | He's barely even trying, often winning segments with a child on his bike |
| 02:04 - 02:07 | Pete Hopkins |
| 02:07 - 02:07 | ...you've met Mary |
| 02:09 - 02:14 | I have and he ruined my life |
| 02:14 - 02:20 | My knees are shot to pieces I can barely walk |
| 02:18 - 02:22 | My knees hurt too |
| 02:22 - 02:24 | Have you ever had hurty knees ? |
| 02:25 - 02:27 | He gave me the nickname |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Uncle warm hands |
| 02:29 - 02:31 | a name I struggle with |
| 02:31 - 02:33 | Uncle warm ..... Hands !!! |
| 02:33 - 02:35 | Look at the size of those shovels !,,, |
| 02:35 - 02:38 | They are ridiculous |
| 02:39 - 02:42 | Since the making of this show all contributors have received counselling |
| 02:42 - 02:44 | they have signed out of Strava |
| 02:44 - 02:46 | Mary Berry continues to go from Strength to strength |
| 02:46 - 02:51 | ...he refused to take part in the show as he states that cycling is |
| 02:51 - 02:54 | just a way of getting around .. |
