00:00 - 00:03 | We tried really hard to get everyone together like you asked, |
00:04 - 00:05 | But even though we looked here and here |
00:05 - 00:07 | and especially here, |
00:08 - 00:12 | we were unable to get any strippers for your party |
00:12 - 00:15 | and things in general are not really looking good |
00:17 - 00:19 | Forget the strippers, |
00:19 - 00:21 | What about the Fireball? |
00:24 - 00:26 | Tommy.. |
00:27 - 00:28 | unfortunately... |
00:31 - 00:33 | Tommy, there is no more fireball left |
00:34 - 00:36 | The store was completely out of stock |
00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who didn't come to my birthday party get out of the room. |
01:13 - 01:15 | How could you idiots be so stupid! |
01:15 - 01:17 | How could ANYBODY be this stupid?! |
01:18 - 01:23 | We have been talking about this Bachelor weekend for months! |
01:25 - 01:28 | Absolutely unbelievable! |
01:29 - 01:31 | I thought I told you all |
01:31 - 01:34 | BRING FIREBALL or don't come |
01:34 - 01:37 | because you pussys are all afraid of having fun |
01:37 - 01:40 | Why don't we just drink Cosmos! |
01:40 - 01:42 | Tommy we still have Captain Morgan |
01:42 - 01:46 | Rum? What are we Puerto Ricans? |
01:46 - 01:48 | But Tommy, it is Captain Morgan Private Stock |
01:48 - 01:52 | Oh Perfect, then we'll be fancy Puerto Ricans! |
01:53 - 01:54 | ASSHOLES! |
01:56 - 01:57 | Can it really be |
01:57 - 02:00 | too much to ask of you idiots |
02:00 - 02:03 | to throw a simple bachelor party? |
02:04 - 02:08 | I want to feel like a god damned princess! |
02:08 - 02:13 | You should be carrying me in on fucking throne! |
02:14 - 02:16 | And showering me in Fireball! |
02:17 - 02:21 | not denying me of the sacred nectar on my special day! |
02:27 - 02:29 | Is it really that much to ask? |
02:30 - 02:34 | For one special day for everyone to |
02:34 - 02:36 | just be focused on me and everything that I want! |
02:41 - 02:42 | Seriously though |
02:43 - 02:47 | When I tell you I want to party with Fireball, |
02:48 - 02:53 | I don't expect you stupid assholes |
02:54 - 02:56 | to disappoint me so horrendously. |
02:56 - 02:59 | I at least thought maybe you could be trusted |
03:00 - 03:02 | but clearly I was mistaken! |
03:04 - 03:07 | Don't cry, He's Rachel's problem now |
03:14 - 03:16 | It's my own fault really |
03:19 - 03:23 | I expected tigers and sharks with laser beams on their heads |
03:25 - 03:26 | but I should have known better |
03:31 - 03:33 | A dream I suppose |
03:40 - 03:46 | Well, at a time like this there seems to be only one option |
03:46 - 03:49 | We'll just have to do what we always do |
03:53 - 03:56 | Drink Jagermeister. |