Hitlers Ferguson Problem
870 views • 11/27/2014
Hitlers Ferguson Problem
| 00:00 - 00:03 | We have been closely monitoring the protesters Twitter feeds and have learned |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | that they are descending upon a number of preplanned locations |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | 'The Wig and Weave Emporium', 'Mookies Midnight Liquors' and 'We-'B'-Rimz-'N'-Shit', |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | We also know that MSNBC, CNN and Fox News |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | will have camera crews at these locations. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Not to worry. The National Guard will prevent any monkey buisness |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | We'll look good in front of Anderson Cooper. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mister Mayor |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Nixon... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | The National Guard is still at the armory. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Governor Nixon forgot to charge his smartpthone and was unable to make the call. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Those that assured me that Wilson would be indicted and not worry, leave the room. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK!!! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | WHAT DO YOU MEAN, NO NATIONAL GUARD? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | That cocksucker Nixon did this to me on purpose! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | That little fucking prick is jealous that Megyn Kelly |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | is talking about Ferguson instead of his faggot ass. |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Things are only going to get worse from here. |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Just wait. That shit stirrer Al Sharpton will be on the next bus |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | down here expecting me to kiss his black ass. |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Mister Mayor, no one gives a fuck about what Al Sharpton has to say. |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Does it really matter? He'll still be talking shit about me in front of the cameras. |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | We could always throw Wilson under the bus and say he lied to us. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Speaking of that fucker Wilson! If I told that trigger happy moron once, I told him a million times. |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | "D", you can't be doing that kind of shit out there.. |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | This isn't Selma or Mobile. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | You can't be partying like it's fucking 1964 |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | But nooooooo. He has to go out there and go play Dirty "Fucking" Harry |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | No, wait, I take that back. |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | At least Dirty "Fucking" Harry could get the job done with one bullet. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | In my day we knew how to do things right |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | The perp was calmly cuffed and stuffed. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | And if there was an unfortunate accident on the way to the station, |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | or the perp was shot while trying to escape, |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | we knew how to sweep it under the rug. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | How the fuck am I going to deal with this shit? |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Ferguson will be burning like Dresden |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | If Mookies is torched, where the fuck am I supposed to get my Schnapps and scratch tickets? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | And just when I had an appointment to have my staff car fitted with twankie-fo's and sub's at "We-'B'-Rimz", |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | the place will be picked cleaner than the ammo shelves at Wal-Mart |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I had to wait months for that appointment. |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | He'll be fine. Tire Rack and Crutchfield have better bargains anyways. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I was going to be pimpin my ride and sipping my Schnapps |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | and jamming to "The Flight of The Valkyries". |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Fuck! |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | At least Auto Zone will still be open for buisness. I suppose I can get my rims and sound system there. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | My staff car will look and sound like shit. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Find Wilson. Tell him he can have his job back if he wants it. |
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