00:00 - 00:05 | Pandemic started I said get a business setup get on Alibaba quick! |
00:05 - 00:07 | we found a poor quality test available there and then |
00:07 - 00:10 | I phone my friend in Britain, said he had connections with government |
00:11 - 00:16 | could get this test through Porton Down no problem |
00:17 - 00:21 | Thing is I met this guy when he sold me a pair of Dr Martens |
00:21 - 00:24 | He's a shoes salesman, works out a 2 bedroom house |
00:29 - 00:31 | it's true! |
00:31 - 00:34 | We get a phonecall from Fixer Bell, says it's passed evaluation! |
00:38 - 00:40 | it's true! |
00:41 - 00:47 | So I said shit, get a wordpress site setup and a logo from fiverr.com for the boxes |
00:47 - 00:50 | I phone Biotime in China, tell them we've sold billions of these tests |
00:50 - 00:56 | you need to start making them, quick! |
00:58 - 00:59 | He says "but they're shite" |
00:59 - 01:01 | "Who's buying them?" |
01:04 - 01:06 | I tell them, those clowns in the UK government |
01:06 - 01:08 | Bojo want's to spend 3.2 billion on them..... |
01:13 - 01:14 | its true! |
01:14 - 01:16 | Best thing is |
01:16 - 01:20 | They ask how can we get them to the UK from China |
01:21 - 01:27 | He says we'll pay for the planes to go and pick them up! Another £80 million |
01:35 - 01:36 | We don't even have to bother phoning DPD |
01:36 - 01:39 | All these planes coming from the UK to pick them up, great |
01:41 - 01:44 | We get them to the UK, then Handcock phones me |
01:44 - 01:47 | "Can we change the sample collection menthod? |
01:47 - 01:49 | and stick an NHS logo on the box? |
01:50 - 01:53 | we'll get it through the MHRA for home testing" |
01:54 - 01:56 | An already bad test |
01:56 - 01:58 | now even worse |
01:58 - 02:02 | He's delighted it's got the NHS logo on it, buys another £1,000,000,000 |
02:05 - 02:07 | It's true! |
02:10 - 02:11 | So now we've got a 6 month old company |
02:11 - 02:13 | £3.2 billion in our bank account |
02:15 - 02:17 | So we try the same in USA |
02:17 - 02:20 | Then we get this letter from the FDA |
02:21 - 02:28 | We only went and copy pasted the statistics from the wrong test on Alibaba |
02:29 - 02:30 | The wrong test? |
02:30 - 02:32 | Yeah a much bettter one |
02:36 - 02:39 | So when the news hits the UK |
02:40 - 02:42 | I think that's it.... it's over for us.... |
02:50 - 02:55 | They can't possibly keep buying our test after this..... |
02:56 - 02:58 | And what happened? |
02:58 - 03:04 | We took our website down, laid low for a bit |
03:04 - 03:09 | Our approval was due for expiry the next week |
03:09 - 03:11 | Then I got a call from Fixer Bell..... |
03:16 - 03:20 | They only went and extended the EUA for home use |
03:23 - 03:26 | Another billion pounds! |
03:31 - 03:36 | God bless those Tory MPs |