| 00:00 - 00:03 | Your cat did well at her groom, sir. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | We took her to the Happy Cat Spa |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | There are a few of them. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | They are the World's Greatest |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Everyone takes their cats there. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | I know. They I hear they love Maine Coons. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Thats why I want Kittyjew Lollipop to go there. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | KittyJew |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | KittyJew Lollipop is not a Maine Coon |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | They said she is just a big cat with long fur. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | If you are in this room and don't have a cat, leave now. Especially Krepps and Burgdoff |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | This is fucking bullshit! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Of course she is a Maine Coon! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | I paid over $3000 American dollars for her! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | What do they mean she is not a Maine Coon |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Her coat is magnificent! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Its silky and smooth. She has it coming from her ears! I call it SS! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | These people think they are professionals?! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | They wouldn't know a Maine Coon if it bit them in the face! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | They're the best in the world. Its indisputable. |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | If thats the case, how can they say she is not a Maine Coon! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | They know all the breeds! They think you were scammed. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | How does the leader of the Nazi party get scammed! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Look at my mustache! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Do I look like a fool who is told |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | that a fat long haired cat from under a barn |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | is a $3,000 Maine Coon who was bred specifically for me?! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Where the fuck is Fensterbein? He's the asshole who recommended I use this breeder in the first place! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | What am I supposed to do now? I have people coming over to breed her this weekend |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | And now I have to tell them she's a fucking barn cat?! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | I love this cat more than anyone loves a cat and that includes that douchebag Stalin! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I bet everyone who has a fat long haired cat thinks shes a Maine Coon |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | And I am the fool who paid $3000? I am the fool! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | I should have just bought a persian and been done with it. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | I knew she wasn't a Maine Coon |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Sweet and affectionate MY ASS! She bites my hands whenever I try to pet her! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | She pisses on the bed and rips my couch to shreds. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | The other night the bitch cried until 3:30 in the morning |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | When I finally got up to feed her, she had a full bowl, |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | but had shit directly on top of my slippers! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Its ok. Most cats do this. They are assholes. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I have to rethink this whole thing. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I don't want to live a lie. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Maybe I should just get a dog. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I can name him Bingo. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Call the Happy Cat Hotel & Spa. Tell them thank you for grooming her |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | and thank you for telling me the truth about her. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | They really are the World's Greatest. |
