| 00:02 - 00:04 | Is that Riga on the phone again? |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Yes, but not Jose Riga, Riga in Latvia and a very angry man called Val |
| 00:08 - 00:14 | He wants answers now, he has a crack squad of Russian hitman en route to Bloomfield Road as we speak |
| 00:15 - 00:16 | What for? I've done nothing wrong |
| 00:17 - 00:18 | Just be nice to him and plead insanity |
| 00:18 - 00:20 | OK, give me the phone |
| 00:22 - 00:23 | Valeri |
| 00:23 - 00:26 | Are we still friends? |
| 00:26 - 00:27 | No |
| 00:27 - 00:29 | We're not? Are you coming over to Blackpool soon? |
| 00:29 - 00:31 | I'm not, but some friends of mine are |
| 00:31 - 00:36 | Dont be like that, do you realise I was cock of Lancaster Grammar School |
| 00:36 - 00:40 | Was you now, hang on I've just got an e mail from my mate TAM |
| 00:40 - 00:46 | It says the locals are preparing to storm the ground and riot, apparently you can't raise a team for the start of the season at Forest |
| 00:46 - 00:51 | In fact you can't get a side for Alfreton and they are a pub side in a sleepy mining village and managed by a ex copper |
| 00:51 - 00:54 | They are, but they have one lad who was a Man Utd trainee |
| 00:55 - 01:00 | And besides do you know what I was quoted for a coach all that way |
| 01:02 - 01:04 | What are you three gawping at? |
| 01:05 - 01:10 | Get on the phone now to Hills security, tell them to send every man they've got to the ground, and tell them to get a move on |
| 01:11 - 01:16 | But Karl why don't you just buy a couple of players, I heard Keigan Parker and Brett Ormerod are free |
| 01:16 - 01:17 | Piss off |
