00:00 - 00:05 | And so I'm sitting at my computer |
00:05 - 00:07 | Next thing you know I see an email from OSHA |
00:07 - 00:10 | sitting in my inbox |
00:11 - 00:16 | Some bullshit about people not wearing masks |
00:17 - 00:21 | This letter doesn't mean shit |
00:21 - 00:24 | At all |
00:29 - 00:31 | They think... |
00:31 - 00:34 | I really give a shit about their fucking health |
00:38 - 00:40 | Fucking morons |
00:41 - 00:47 | You know what I'm gonna do? |
00:47 - 00:50 | I'm just going to set up more hand sanitizer stations |
00:50 - 00:56 | With bulk hand sanitizer that can give you cancer |
00:58 - 00:59 | Then I'm going to |
00:59 - 01:01 | tell Anthony to give them... |
01:04 - 01:06 | more of the thong face masks |
01:06 - 01:08 | that we bought for 2 cents a piece |
01:13 - 01:14 | Thong face masks! |
01:14 - 01:16 | That don't even cover your face! |
01:16 - 01:20 | Anthony got them |
01:21 - 01:27 | off some truck in a bodega in Downtown LA |
01:35 - 01:36 | I wouldn't even give that |
01:36 - 01:39 | to my worse fucking enemy |
01:41 - 01:44 | But seriously... |
01:44 - 01:47 | they think they can just refuse to come back to the office |
01:47 - 01:49 | just because some people caught COVID |
01:50 - 01:53 | So I'm just going to cut their hours |
01:54 - 01:56 | in half! |
01:56 - 01:58 | They think they're somehow irreplaceable |
01:58 - 02:02 | When I already hired their replacements! |
02:05 - 02:07 | Idiots |
02:10 - 02:11 | They think... |
02:11 - 02:13 | They think... |
02:15 - 02:17 | I'm going to close the office for a day |
02:17 - 02:20 | and do a deep clean of the entire office |
02:21 - 02:28 | I'm just going to have the cleaning crew mop the floors like they always do and spray some air fresheners |
02:29 - 02:30 | So they think its clean? |
02:30 - 02:32 | So they think its clean! |
02:36 - 02:39 | I don't give a shit if they get sick |
02:40 - 02:42 | As long as they keep making me money |
02:50 - 02:55 | We're going to throw them another pizza party |
02:56 - 02:58 | To welcome them back? |
02:58 - 03:04 | So they think we're welcoming them back |
03:04 - 03:09 | But really it's to get them all in a small space |
03:09 - 03:11 | And be in the same room as the field techs |
03:16 - 03:20 | And none of the field techs will be wearing masks! |
03:23 - 03:26 | And the field techs will lick all the pizza slices! |
03:31 - 03:36 | We'll see if they actually get COVID from the workplace this time. |