| 00:00 - 00:03 | The protest are spreading nationwide ever since the Floyd incident. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Some states don't have them, but are picking up. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Such as in Florida and New Mexico. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | And things are so crazy that some of them are protesting in DC. Matter of fact, they are already right here on our gates. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | It will be a manner of time before they breach them and head towards the White House directly. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Eh, whatever. Anyways. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Where are my golf clubs? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mr. President... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | If I may... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | We need you to actually guide us in this situation. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Our nation is in chaos. Also, we lost your golf clubs. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Those who don't like Fox & Friends and Tucker Carlson. Get out. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Those golf clubs were my babies! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | You know how many yards those babies added to my drive?! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | You think any golf club can do that?! Do you?! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Oh, you guys are worse than Rosie. |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | You know how much history I had with those clubs?! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | I won my first game with those babies! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Matter of fact, those were the clubs I bought with my million dollar loan. |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | You fucking peasants, you are worse than my sons. |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Mr. President, we are at a crisis. Your golf clubs should not be the priority right now. |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Not a priority?! They are my fucking babies you buffoon! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Mr. President, the protesters are at our gates. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Who gives a shit if they are at our gates. |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Just shoot the thugs! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | You think I became president to drain the swamp |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | And to make America great again |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | But guess what? I don't give a shit about any of that. |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | I just fed that bullshit to attract the uneducated lower class to vote for me. |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | So I can use my power as President to shut people who don't support me and my businesses! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Is that so much to ask?! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Now that piece of shit Bloomberg is gonna beat my drives when we go golfing at Marilago! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Melania hasn't let me fuck her for a while now |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | But I could get closure with my clubs |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Closure and pleasure as I swing them |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Fucking hell |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | I want to find out who is responsible for my lost clubs so I can tweet about him! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I bet Obama is responsible for this conundrum that I am in right now |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | But jokes on him. I am President now. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | And as President, I declare he is the worst President ever! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Yeah, an unworthy Kenyan who drove this country to shit! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Is okay, I fact checked. Obama was actually pretty good. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Without my clubs I am nothing. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | This is worse than when Ivanka said no to my sexual passings. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | The worst... |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | This is the worst American tragedy in history |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | But if you think I am gonna stop golfing because of this, you are sorely mistaken. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | I am gonna go golfing soon with different clubs. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Kill the protesters. |
