| 00:00 - 00:03 | The math teachers are bringing the grades for the junior cadets. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | The honors course from Berlin. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Malsdorf in Geometry; Karlshorst in Logic. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | They have failed all of the cadets |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Apparently It was a right circular cone that really upset them. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Gather all the test papers quickly. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | We will have them re-graded by Steiner. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Fuhrer
|
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Steiner
|
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Steiner can't solve the problem either. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | It has to do with similar triangles. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone out except Keitel, Jodl, Krebs, and Burgdorf |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | What the hell are they thinking? Now no new officers |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | All over some fucking |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | "similar triangles problem" ? |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | What do they think is going to happen? |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Can't they remember the conditions |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | ANGLE ANGLE ANGLE is all they need |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | The teachers don't give a fuck anymore ! They must change the grades. |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | This must be in the textbook ! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Sir, the teachers have not read the next chapter |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Is that any excuse to flunk them. Give them some extra help ! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | The teachers say that the students aren't studying enough. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Show them how to make better crib sheets |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | What a sad state of affairs. |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | And they always need to find someone to blame. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | "The elementary school teachers are to blame" |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | "The parents -- even the grandparents -- are to blame." |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | FaceBook and Twitter are to blame. |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | We need to get mathematics out of the schools |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Maybe we could teach basket weaving but then... |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Some asshole with discover patterns in the baskets and we're screwed. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | We need a plan. Give calculators to the students! And a new test! |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Only one page. All arithmetic. No words - just numbers |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Then they will all pass and go to the front. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | No thinking. Just punch in numbers and hit Equals. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | No work to show, just the answer. Use pink magic marker. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Just throw reasoning out the door and show people you're angry. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Yeah. That'll work. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Partial credit for the wrong decimal point. |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | No need to understand. |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | It's okay Anna, our smartphones have calculators. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | The cadets will graduate |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | They'll feel satisfied with the results |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | "We won." |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Senior officers can go on vacation. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | But keep an eye on the teachers. Take away their pencils if the use x's and y's |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And we know how this will turn out. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Parallel lines do meet -- at infinity |
