| 00:00 - 00:03 | According to a Reuters news flash, the British Government has apparently just been bought by Honda. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | The deal went through in the early hours of this morning, |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | It's just been announced by Honda's Managing Director. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Honda fought off rival bids from Unilever and John Lewis, |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and is believed to have paid upwards of four hundred million for the troubled democracy giant. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | That's a ridiculous idea. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | You're obviously making it up. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Furry, |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Honda... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Honda really has bought the British Government. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | It's a terrible thing. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | If you want to hear what I want to say on the matter, then stay. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I believe, very firmly that it was a fair price! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Honda have given us satisfactory undertakings |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | to the effect that they will not be making any massive changes to the structure of government |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | ...for at least six months... |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | and that their only social alterations |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | will involve converting Wales... |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | ...into a seven-million-hole golf course... |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | and replacing all the houses with perspex living-pods! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Mein Fuher, I must ask, have you tried...? |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Yes, I've tried one of these pods myself, and it was very nice! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | But Mein Fuhrer! What about unemployment? |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Oh, what about unemployment? You people are obsessed, aren't you? |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | It's always the same! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Every time some change comes along, |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | that might really do this country a bit of good, it's the same old |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | "What about unemployment?" |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | I mean, change the bleeding record, can't you? |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Yes, there will be some unemployment! Honda have pointed out that we really don't need 620 people in the House of Commons, for instance. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | There will be a new, laser- guided legislative machine ... |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Just rejoice, why can't you? It's a compliment, for Gott's sach! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | It shows that this government... |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | as we've always claimed, is an attractive proposition to our customers. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | This is a good deal for Britain!! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | This is a good deal for Britain |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Just REJOICE! This is a good deal for Britain! A good deal! This is a good deal! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | If you want to be right-wing and nationalistic and bigoted, then go and live in Russia. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | The British taxpayer has got a good deal here. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | A good deal! A good deal! A good deal! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | A G-O-O-D, D-E-A-L! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Cheer up, at least it's not No-Deal. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | You say get rid of the Royal Family... |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | But who are you going to put on the stamps? |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Me? |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Do I have to turn over a stamp... |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | ...and lick myself everytime I want to send a letter? |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | It's a good deal, I tell you... |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | ...A good deal. |
