| 00:00 - 00:03 | Sir, this is my report on Baser's Stag Do! |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | We stopped for a breakfast |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | at Plymptons McDonalds. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | We then proceeded by bus to Millbay Docks |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Where we boarded the ferry to Roscoff in France |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Was everyone on time? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | You know I hate bad time keeping. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Kenny |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Kenny Allen and Hairdresser Paul were both late. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | and Paul had to bring his boy with him. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | All those who took their shirts off on the wedding night leave now! |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I knew if anyone would be late |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | It would be them pair of cunts |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | They were probably playing pigeon toss outside against the fucking wall |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Pair of fucking imboceles |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | I bet those cunts turned up late... |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | with no fucking beers either |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | They are the tightest pair of fuckers I have ever met |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | and who the fuck brings their boy with them on a stag do? |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Mein Fuhrer, he would not be allowed to go without him |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Its a stag do not a fucking crèche!!!! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Mein Fuher, the boy partied harder than both of them |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | That doesnt surprise me, theyre a pair of old cunts |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Please tell me |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | That John and Brian |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Both stayed up later and partied harder |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | Than those pair of good for nothing useless cunts |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | And please dont tell me that Big Fat Ben went on all night |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | about have you ever seen a fucking seagull in a fucking tree shit. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Ill shoot the fucker myself if he did |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | And I bet that fucking carpet layer Dean talked all night like he was in the fucking mafia. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | At least you had Paul there as best man |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I can rely on that man, he comes from good stock. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Someone who can steady the ship. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | As for the stag |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Who the fuck gets married on Friday the fucking 13th? |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I know why that lovely Louise went ahead and agreed to it. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Because she used up all her bad luck |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | The day she met that fucking idiot. |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | She can now fall in shit and come out smelling of roses |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Dont worry Orca, stop whaling. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | At least I hear the wedding went well |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I did hear there was a good band. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Two blokes |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Lying down on stage |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Both with their shirts off holding a mic and looking into each others eyes |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And I hear one had lovely hair |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Hed get it from behind |
