| 00:01 - 00:07 | Welcome to to the Townsland News Network |
| 00:08 - 00:13 | Today we will talk about how great our master is |
| 00:14 - 00:18 | CatCool45! |
| 00:19 - 00:20 | He is greatest |
| 00:21 - 00:23 | He is our god! |
| 00:24 - 00:30 | And to talk about the news |
| 00:31 - 00:35 | It turns out Townsland is the best place in the world |
| 00:36 - 00:38 | Our great flag with a red star is the best! |
| 00:39 - 00:42 | We have declared war on the world! |
| 00:43 - 00:46 | We beat the World Cup! |
| 00:46 - 00:49 | Time's Up for today! |
| 00:49 - 00:52 | Remember. You are worst and Townsland is best. |
