| 00:00 - 00:03 | We have had more reports of those drunk twats during Carnival. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | A car was trampled on just outside Berlin and there was some mild drinking issues over here. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | I understand there was also plenty of cock-blocking done at a local club. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Mainly over in the club Stardust where they spent loads. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | An owl was also found at the scene, here. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Did someone call dibs? If they did it first, that is the law. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | We're subject to the law of dibs. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Sir... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | there's more |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | There was a sex pest wondering around. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | "Ratty" went after grandmothers. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | If your grandmother was groped, licked, kissed, fisted, bummed, touched by the Ratty, please leave now. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I don't care about grandmothers for fuck's sake! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I want to hear about the car-walking twat. |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | That prick is going to get it in the face. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | No one walks over our cars. Vorsprung durch tecnik! |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Forget this Ratty shit. |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | We can still catch the fuckers. Did we get a witness? |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Did we get a witness? Get the coppers together! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | We need to string him up! Who did you deploy to catch them? |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Well, there was this guy in a clown suit- |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Clown? You sent in a fucking clown? Did he at least have a gun? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Well, yes. It sprayed water though... |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | A clown? A fucking clown? Did they catch a witness at least? |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Gave him a cavity search perhaps? |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | We had one chance to lock down those assholes. You sent a clown. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | They left used wax strips. You see them? |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | It was hairier than a French feminist in winter. |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Seriously, this is utterly ridiculous. We thought it was a rat sniffing the floor |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | I'm going to wax that clown's balls with it. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Then I'm going to find the car-walker, grab him by the throat |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | and I'm going to make him eat it. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | It's too late isn't it? They've taken their wax strips and left. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Doing that wolf of wallstreet chest thing |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | They've left me with nothing! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | A fucking car. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | And you sent out Krusty to catch them, like that's enough. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Where are my supermen? My perfect soldiers? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Walking on cars during the carnival. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Why can't people be happy just watching in a gimp mask? |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Maybe go to the Cathedral? It has a lead roof! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, Ratty teabagged his mum. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I need a lappy at Stardust to get me through this. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I suppose at least that Polish bird is about to do that thing with the winking anus. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | It does the trick. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Trick means erection. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | I want a dozen cheap beers from Lidl, some currywurst and bring me the owl you found. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And check if Pascha's open. I'm sure owl would like that. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I'm going to pound the shit out of something tonight. |
