| 00:01 - 00:04 | We believe you've threatened to sell your story about breaking susan boyles VL |
| 00:04 - 00:08 | One night in the gorbals |
| 00:08 - 00:11 | First of all, i only nipped her ootside the pavillion |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | her cat pebbles got jealous and sucker punched me |
| 00:15 - 00:17 | i've done nowt wrang but kiss a toad in a communion dress |
| 00:17 - 00:18 | nae need for the bravado |
| 00:18 - 00:20 | Wit wummin brings a cat tae a elvis tribute? |
| 00:21 - 00:22 | a fuckin bint |
| 00:22 - 00:27 | and then expects ye tae shave her back..that's a no no! |
| 00:28 - 00:30 | shave her back? |
| 00:30 - 00:32 | sounds like a horrible ordeal! |
| 00:33 - 00:34 | are you coping? |
| 00:35 - 00:37 | you ever tried |
| 00:37 - 00:40 | goin tae town on a silver back pal? |
| 00:40 - 00:43 | needed mare than a gilette and a hedge trimmer |
| 00:43 - 00:45 | tae get oot of that jungle |
| 00:45 - 00:47 | jeremy kyle husnae got a look in |
| 00:47 - 00:54 | good luck with yer counselling |
