| 00:00 - 00:03 | I have grave news... |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | the Diacos are coming for Christmas |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | They will be driving on interstate 80 at 11 am |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | I heard Luigi has not eaten in a week |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | And he has not taken a dump in two days |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Its ok, we have plenty of food |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | And Joanna just bought new air fresheners |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Um.. |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | The food... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | The food and fresheners are missing |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Word on the street is that Jack ran off with them |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who thinks Joanna is not a clean freak, get out now |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Do you realize what we have done? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | The smell of shit!? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Luigi will try to eat Jack and fill our toilets with feces! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | No one will be safe from his hunger! |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | You think Louie will get more food!? |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Louie will sit on his ass and play games! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | And lazy Pat will be right next to him! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | At least we can rely on Cindy to bring tasty meat |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | I heard that Cindy is bringing sea weed surprise. |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Who eats that shit are you serious! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Its healthy and full of vitamin D |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Last time I ate it I had to shit for days! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | You think Mia is going to be happy with that! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | When she finds out! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | She will smash anything in her hands! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | She will enrage and attack us! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Our only hope is if Mia brings meat! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | But the last I heard, she only eats veggie burgers! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | We are going to need more than that! |
| 02:17 - 02:23 | The last time Luigi came, he ate everything in the house then took a bite out of my arm! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | His appetite is unquenchable |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | He will pound his chest and demand more! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Not even Peggy will be able to calm him down |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Even if we do find any food |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Cindy will start telling Debbie Downer stories the likes of which you have never heard |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Kids getting hurt in car accidents, limbs and body parts falling off! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | We are going to need more |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Peggy will be over dramatic |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | She will blame it on Jack and cry! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | It's okay Peggy, you aren't too dramatic |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Maybe we can call Aunt Rosa |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | The meatballs she brought last time were pretty good |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I know of one... |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Uncle Joe |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | We are just going to have to go to the store |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | We are going to have to double the air fresheners |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | And god help us if uncle Tommy finds out |
