| 00:00 - 00:05 | So after two easy finals, we end up playing Adelaide in the big dance |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | The Crows think they already have the cup in the bag |
| 00:07 - 00:10 | "Richmond can't win the grand final, they are terrible!" |
| 00:11 - 00:16 | "They don't even know what time it starts." |
| 00:14 - 00:15 | "Just turn up." |
| 00:17 - 00:21 | The Tiges win by 8 goals |
| 00:21 - 00:24 | 8 goals! |
| 00:29 - 00:31 | 8 goals! |
| 00:31 - 00:34 | The Crows elite forwards kicked 8 goals to 16 |
| 00:38 - 00:40 | 48 points! |
| 00:41 - 00:47 | Rory Slone dominated the first quarter. You know how we stopped him? |
| 00:47 - 00:50 | We put a five gamer on him. Jack Graham. |
| 00:50 - 00:56 | He kicked three goals while shutting down his childhood hero. |
| 00:58 - 00:59 | He was pick 53, |
| 00:59 - 01:01 | 19-years-old. |
| 01:04 - 01:06 | Shutdown superstar Rory Slone. |
| 01:06 - 01:08 | The only teenager out there. |
| 01:13 - 01:14 | 8 goals! |
| 01:14 - 01:16 | The Crows had their lowest score this year. |
| 01:16 - 01:20 | We even gave them a two-goal head start. |
| 01:21 - 01:27 | Their elite forward line was no match for Rance, Grimes and our spearhead plumber Nathan Broad! |
| 01:35 - 01:36 | Now they look like a bunch of arrogant flogs |
| 01:36 - 01:39 | with that stupid power stance during the National Anthem |
| 01:41 - 01:44 | No, but seriously, we are very lucky |
| 01:44 - 01:47 | That some of their best players had their worst game this year |
| 01:47 - 01:49 | In the grand final of all weeks. |
| 01:50 - 01:53 | Maybe if Talia had gotten more than 3 disposals |
| 01:54 - 01:56 | they would have stood a chance. |
| 01:56 - 01:58 | He is the best defender in the AFL after all. |
| 01:58 - 02:02 | Far better than All-Australian Captain Alex Rance. |
| 02:05 - 02:07 | 8 goals! |
| 02:10 - 02:11 | Maybe they |
| 02:11 - 02:13 | Maybe they can |
| 02:15 - 02:17 | Maybe they can blame the umpires |
| 02:17 - 02:20 | Or say we made some backroom-deals with the AFL. |
| 02:21 - 02:28 | After all, the AFL is just a Victorian boys' club. It's all rigged so that interstate sides can never win the flag, like Brisbane in the 2000s. |
| 02:29 - 02:30 | Like Brisbane's 3-peat? |
| 02:30 - 02:32 | Yeah, like Brisbane's 3-peat. |
| 02:36 - 02:39 | Because the last 5 flags have been won by Victorian sides |
| 02:40 - 02:42 | It must all be rigged! |
| 02:50 - 02:55 | Dustin Martin is the first player to win the Brownlow, Norm and Premiership |
| 02:56 - 02:58 | In one year? |
| 02:58 - 03:04 | Yeah. Maybe with the pick they get for Lever they can draft the next Dusty. |
| 03:04 - 03:09 | Or maybe they can have him in 2025. |
| 03:09 - 03:11 | Our drought is already over. |
| 03:16 - 03:20 | And we still have Dusty for seven more years. |
| 03:23 - 03:26 | He was never going to lolnorf |
| 03:31 - 03:36 | He's now a premiership player, and a Tiger for life. |
