| 00:00 - 00:03 | Sir, only one of 4 flames went off |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | The women's toilets |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | smelled worse than usual |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Also, Clemson won in Lexington |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | It was the prime time game, so no one saw our loss |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Any word on Deebo's leg? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Will he be ready for LTech? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Sir, the leg is destroyed |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | He is out for the season |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | There will be no bowl for us |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | And Clemson is now ranked #2 |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | I want only people have have defeated Kentucky in this room |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Our QB weighs 64 pounds |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | And our defense is once again pathetic |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Vanderbilt is going to beat us |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | And we'll all lose our jobs |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Meanwhile Clemson is on it's way |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | to another natty |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Every week they're on a real channel |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | And all they do is reload |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Sir they have a beautiful campus to recruit to |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | We have underage sex at tailgates and fights before games |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | But their captains shake hands |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Can't we buy recruits places to stay? |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Can't we do dirty SEC things? |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Just once I want a player like Watson |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Or Williams, or Gallman |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | Or even Kelly Bryant |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | I have some 14 year old boy |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Who falls over when the wind blows |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | And a DB who gets carried on the backs of wide outs |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | And now I have to do a post game show??? |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Someone get me a Miller Lite |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I'm going out like Spurlid |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | How can I win a state title |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | when I can't even beat Kentucky |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | This place is a dump |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | No one would send their kid here |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | No fancy uniform or pyrotechnics can fix this |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | We're pathetic |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | We can't even protect visiting fans |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Everyone knows not to go to 5 points |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Maybe I should go be a DC for Texas |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | At least then I'd be average |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | 5th place in the SEC East |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Living in Columbia, SC |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | I can't think of anything worse |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Dabo is going to beat my guts out again |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I'll have that stupid wide eyed look |
