00:00 - 00:03 | We'll have Sam Baes in goal again |
00:04 - 00:05 | Ed, Laurence and Little Joe |
00:05 - 00:07 | Rory facing |
00:08 - 00:12 | Caleb, Jungle and obviously Bem. |
00:12 - 00:15 | The bench will be as bare as a badger's arse, but it's a team |
00:17 - 00:19 | I like Little Joe. He chops fat chicks. |
00:19 - 00:21 | Which other 2s are coming up? |
00:24 - 00:26 | Sir... |
00:27 - 00:28 | We've had to... |
00:31 - 00:33 | We've had to put Howlett in attack. |
00:34 - 00:36 | A lot of guys have left. We're really short. |
00:53 - 00:58 | Bemjamin, Ed, Edison stay. Everyone else GTFO. |
01:13 - 01:15 | What the actual fuck is going on here? |
01:15 - 01:17 | Nick fucking Howlett??? |
01:18 - 01:23 | This is a fucking disgrace! |
01:25 - 01:28 | I wouldn't trust him to sit the right way on a toilet! |
01:29 - 01:31 | He can barely sustain human life, |
01:31 - 01:34 | let alone play first team lax |
01:34 - 01:37 | This is a fucking disaster |
01:37 - 01:40 | Never mind Varsity, are we even going to score a goal all season? |
01:40 - 01:42 | He says he's the fastest player in the club |
01:42 - 01:46 | Fuck that! That's about as true as him shagging 20 girls |
01:46 - 01:48 | He's popular - committee two years running... |
01:48 - 01:52 | Anal is popular - but it's still means someone's getting done up the arse |
01:53 - 01:54 | We're losing Matt Hughes.... |
01:56 - 01:57 | ...and replacing him with Howlett?? |
01:57 - 02:00 | That's like breaking up with Kate Upton... |
02:00 - 02:03 | ...and then swiping right on Lydia. |
02:04 - 02:08 | and what the fuck is going on with those shoes? |
02:08 - 02:13 | He's got a Vapour Elite head... |
02:14 - 02:16 | and a carbon fibre shaft, and those Hopkins gloves |
02:17 - 02:21 | but his shoes are still held together with masking tape?? |
02:27 - 02:29 | He's so fucking moist that I doubt he'd ever seen |
02:30 - 02:34 | a real woman naked before tour. |
02:34 - 02:36 | but somehow there's women giving him sympathy fucks |
02:41 - 02:42 | It makes him think he's not a total bell end |
02:43 - 02:47 | and he's spent half the year ordering the fresh about |
02:48 - 02:53 | like he's got authority - like he's a proper social sec... |
02:54 - 02:56 | ...when in reality he's only a couple alleles away |
02:56 - 02:59 | from being one of Bart's STDs |
03:00 - 03:02 | He's a wanker to everyone and he can't play lacrosse |
03:04 - 03:07 | Don't cry Izzy. Everyone makes mistakes |
03:14 - 03:16 | Jesus. He can't catch. He can't shoot. |
03:19 - 03:23 | He ponces about the crease waiting for the D to slide off him because he's so shit |
03:25 - 03:26 | and 9/10 the ball falls out his pocket before he shoots |
03:31 - 03:33 | I just want to cry - how has it come to this? |
03:40 - 03:46 | I blame the fucking union. Freshers Fayre was shit. |
03:46 - 03:49 | And Pattinson, Phelan, Rupert, Max....leaving me with this oxygen thief |
03:53 - 03:56 | Nick fucking Howlett |