00:00 - 00:03 | Adolf, CNN is reporting... |
00:04 - 00:05 | you're not going to like this... |
00:05 - 00:07 | he's opened new campaign headquarters... |
00:08 - 00:12 | close to the capitol. |
00:12 - 00:15 | Too close, in my opinion. |
00:17 - 00:19 | Who has opened new headquarters? Who??? |
00:19 - 00:21 | Who in the name of God would run for President? |
00:24 - 00:26 | My leader... it's the redhead. |
00:27 - 00:28 | The one with the toupee. |
00:31 - 00:33 | That idiot, Donald Trump. |
00:34 - 00:36 | He's even more insane than last time. |
00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone planning on voting for The Donald, leave this room. Now. |
01:13 - 01:15 | Donald Trump will not get my vote! |
01:15 - 01:17 | I'd rather vote for Sarah Palin!!! |
01:18 - 01:23 | At least she's got experience running a government!! |
01:25 - 01:28 | Trump can't even run a business. |
01:29 - 01:31 | Unless he runs it into the ground. |
01:31 - 01:34 | He's tacky, crude, mean, cynical and smells funny. |
01:34 - 01:37 | And he makes Jeb Bush look normal by comparison! |
01:37 - 01:40 | And... he snubbed me once in Bermuda. |
01:40 - 01:42 | That's because you both wore the same color speedos... |
01:42 - 01:46 | Mine were pink, his were fuschia!!! |
01:46 - 01:48 | They both looked pink. |
01:48 - 01:52 | I filled mine out better, don't you think? |
01:53 - 01:54 | Running for President! What is he thinking? |
01:56 - 01:57 | He'll be the laughing stock of the Democrats! |
01:57 - 02:00 | He'll make Clinton jump by 20 points!!! |
02:00 - 02:03 | The Republicans will lose the election!!! |
02:04 - 02:08 | He'll bring down God's wrath on us all!!! |
02:08 - 02:13 | And he wants Eva for himself, the bastard! |
02:14 - 02:16 | I'd rather shoot her than let The Donald have her. |
02:17 - 02:21 | I want you all to go on social media with memes about his bad hair. |
02:27 - 02:29 | And dump his bankruptcies all over Instagram. |
02:30 - 02:34 | Make fake Donald profiles on Grindr!!! |
02:34 - 02:36 | See if you can dig up some nude selfies. Make "Little Donny" go viral!!! |
02:41 - 02:42 | President!?! |
02:43 - 02:47 | He's not qualified for White House poop-scooper! |
02:48 - 02:53 | I'd rather vote for Michelle Bachman. |
02:54 - 02:56 | And she's not even running. |
02:56 - 02:59 | I tried to convince her, but she's insane. |
03:00 - 03:02 | Even after I tried to send my cute intern to seduce her. |
03:04 - 03:07 | We did get you the antibiotic cream in time, right? |
03:14 - 03:16 | My nipples hurt. |
03:19 - 03:23 | And my ass. |
03:25 - 03:26 | Somebody bring me The Donald's head on a stick. |
03:31 - 03:33 | I feel the need for some BBQ'ed redhead. |
03:40 - 03:46 | I know you're all going to vote for Trump. |
03:46 - 03:49 | And he's going to win the nomination. |
03:53 - 03:56 | I'm going to vote for Bobby Jindal. Cause he's my kinda racist. |