| 00:00 - 00:03 | After months of hiding it, |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Bioware has finally revealed |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | the character creator of Mass Effect Andromeda. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | There is no way to choose different eyes, noses, or eyebrows. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | You're stuck with 8 ugly presets and limited customization. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | This is a joke, right? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | There will surely be a Day 1 patch to fix this. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Sir... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Bioware-- |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | What you see is what you get. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | There is no Day 1 patch. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | If you spend less than an hour on character creation... get out. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | THIS IS DRELLSHIT! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Bioware had five years to develop this game! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | They give us a half-assed character creator-- |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | --and expect us to be satisfied?! |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | This is an outrage! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | First, they removed squadmate customization-- |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | --so PeeBee has to wear a stupid crop top in sub-zero weather, |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | and now they pull this shit? |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | In Bioware's defense-- |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | This is inexcusable! Don't you dare try to defend their laziness! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | --they wanted it streamlined & user-friendly. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | I'm sick of them dumbing down my beloved RPGs! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | It's all EA's fault! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | They wanna appeal to a "broader audience"-- |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | --of brain-dead 'Call of Duty' fanboys |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | (that probably still live in their mother's basement!) |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | For years, diehard fans have been begging for an improved character creator-- |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | --and Bioware repays our patience & loyalty by severely limiting customization! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Mass Effect is supposed to be a role-playing game! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | How can I play as Sara if I can't even change her eyebrow shape?! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Ever since I was a little boy... |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I dreamed of being a woman-- |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | --with bushy eyebrows, like Brooke Shields! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Bioware crushed my dreams. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | I expected this character creator to be better than the one in Dragon Age. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Is that really so much to ask for? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | In Inquisition, *female* dwarves could have BEARDS! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | But in Andromeda, there are no beards-- |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | --only stubble that looks like spray paint! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | At least the hair moves... |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | This is the straw that broke the camel's back. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | They take one step forward and twenty steps backwards. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Pre-order cancelled. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I'm done with Bioware. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | And to think, I took a week off work to play that stupid game... |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | I guess now I'll have to invade Canada. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Such a shame. |
