| 00:00 - 00:03 | Good morning everyone - thanks for turning up. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | 100 registered today |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Stand One is here, next to Heathrow's Main Runway |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Any size Cartridge can be used, and semi's can be loaded with as many as they can fit in. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Stand Two, Three and Four are next to the baggage collection. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | I like the look of those targets - what chokes am I to use? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | I'll figure it out - somehow |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Boss...... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | I suggest... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | You use Muller chokes, unless you want to break two clays at the same time? |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | And we don't know the rules |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | You don't know the rules? I can't believe it. Can you lesser mortals leave us? |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Facebook said that I could hit two birds with one shot! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | If I use Fibre the Wad won't break it! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | You all know how badly I shoot if I have the wrong shoes on! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | If I eat a bacon sandwich, my scores go down the drain... |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Those so called cooks can't knock up a good butty |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | I want easy targets - sitters - something that my 9's will kill... |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | You can get rid of the high towers |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Sod the Battue's and the Rockets |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Boss - we have Ben and Ed shooting here today |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | I don't give a shit! I want to beat them both! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Boss...George might even turn up? |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | We can't afford him! He always bloody wins - It's not fair! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Listen to me! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Replace the lead in their cartridges with rice.. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | That will buggar them up. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | In fact, replace everyones lead with rice! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | and tell those idiot Ref's to mark my card STRAIGHT! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | And if that Cheryl Hall Woman turns up.... |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | I want you to handicap her |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | with a Browning or a Miroku! That'll sort her out. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I never win... |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | My chokes are all wrong - I need advice |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Where do I go from here? |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | perhaps I need Pilla glasses? |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | But where do I go to get advice? Bloody Facebook! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Perhaps the CPSA will be able to help me? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | If I spend even more money on equipment |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | I'll have all the gear, and still no idea! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | What if I change to DTL? I'll easily get in A class |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry dear - DTL is okay - honest. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I'm depressed now |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I've never had a score above 55 |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I've been at it for years |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I'll never beat this game |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Thats it. I 'm packing it in and taking up Airsoft |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | At least I can get dressed up in Cammo gear. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | You lot can carry on without me |
