| 00:00 - 00:05 | so, we hire JIM HARBAUGH in 2011 |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | the "faithful" are is so happy to be relevant |
| 00:07 - 00:10 | we go to the NFCC, Superbowl and NFCC again |
| 00:11 - 00:16 | but the fans didnt know that the entire time... |
| 00:17 - 00:21 | we planned to use HARBAUGH to get them to take out a 2nd mortgage |
| 00:21 - 00:24 | the "faithful" completely ate everything up |
| 00:29 - 00:31 | the stadium isnt even in SF |
| 00:31 - 00:34 | they went into their child's college funds to line our pockets |
| 00:38 - 00:40 | baalke & paraag couldnt keep their mouths shut the entire time |
| 00:41 - 00:47 | so the rumors kept leaking out |
| 00:47 - 00:50 | but the "faithful" kept showing up like the clueless fucks they are |
| 00:50 - 00:56 | and then we sold them PSLs for tens of thousands |
| 00:58 - 00:59 | but the kicker is |
| 00:59 - 01:01 | the tickets were entirely separate |
| 01:04 - 01:06 | so, now theyre thousands and thousands in debt |
| 01:06 - 01:08 | and then after the stadium was paid for |
| 01:13 - 01:14 | we fired harbaugh |
| 01:14 - 01:16 | and get this |
| 01:16 - 01:20 | we replaced him with the janitor |
| 01:21 - 01:27 | JIM TOMSULA |
| 01:35 - 01:36 | we told the "faithful" he was a teacher |
| 01:36 - 01:39 | but the only thing he's taught before was urinal inspection |
| 01:41 - 01:44 | now he's out there on the sidelines with the headset and playbook |
| 01:44 - 01:47 | things didnt go so well for their team |
| 01:47 - 01:49 | so we had to fire tomsula |
| 01:50 - 01:53 | and we told the "faithful" we would stop at nothing |
| 01:54 - 01:56 | to make this right |
| 01:56 - 01:58 | so after we fired the janitor |
| 01:58 - 02:02 | youll never guess who we replaced him with |
| 02:05 - 02:07 | a "genius" |
| 02:10 - 02:11 | a "genius" who runs a high school offense |
| 02:11 - 02:13 | CHIP freaken KELLY |
| 02:15 - 02:17 | it would be a perfect marriage with baalke |
| 02:17 - 02:20 | they both love torn ACLs |
| 02:21 - 02:28 | the "faithful" once again filled the stadium, bought merchandise and vegan hot dogs |
| 02:29 - 02:30 | but now were 1-9 |
| 02:30 - 02:32 | so ill probably have to fire someone |
| 02:36 - 02:39 | maybe ill replace trent with the guy who holds the cables for the cameras over there |
| 02:40 - 02:42 | oh "faithful" |
| 02:50 - 02:55 | i love our fans |
| 02:56 - 02:58 | Host: and what's the value of the team? |
| 02:58 - 03:04 | forbes says our worth is up to 4 billion and growing |
| 03:04 - 03:09 | but you want to know whats my favorite part |
| 03:09 - 03:11 | my favorite part of all this is my father |
| 03:16 - 03:20 | did the exact same thing 10 years ago |
| 03:23 - 03:26 | and the "faithful" completely fell for it again 10 years later |
