| 00:00 - 00:03 | We have arranged a tour to make Hillary look healthy and human. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | She will appear on Jimmy Kimmel to open a pickle jar... |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | And she'll do a photo op here... |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | ...and rest for a few days here... |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | ...and then do a short photo op here. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | You should have her interviewed by "journalists" in our pocket. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Matt Lauer is always good for a light touch. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Fuhrer... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Matt Lauer... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Matt Lauer exposed her as a criminal |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | in her last interview. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | I want everyone to leave except the top three press operatives. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I want that fucking traitor dead! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I want his whole family dead! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Do it or your next job will be mopping up Mama June's vomit! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | We pay these weasels good money to preach our lies. |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | How did he dare ask ANY relevant questions? |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | We pay for softballs and cheers, not real questions. |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | He should be asking her "Are you wonderful or just truly magnificent?" |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | He shouldn't come within 10 light years of the truth!!! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Mein Fuhrer, he's just trying to save his job if Hillary loses. |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Hillary can't lose! She's a woman! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Mein Fuhrer, the polls are tightening up. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Don't give me that crap about polls. |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | VOTES are what counts. |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | She could trail by 20 points and it doesn't matter. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | We always make sure the vote count is what we want. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | But we can't fucking do that if she's in PRISON! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | And if she goes down, we all go down... |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | ...doing time in the slammer, the big house, the stony lonesome... |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | ...the fucking hoosegow. |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | And that's if we get away with our lives! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | So she's a criminal. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | It's not like she can remember anything she's done. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | But she's a vegetable we could control like a robot. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | It doesn't matter. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | It's no use controlling a vegetable who isn't in the white house. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I want you to call that idiot from Brazil. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | No wait her name is Brazil, only she doesn't know how to spell it. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | What kind of idiot pronounces "ILE" like "ILL"? |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | And she stares at a wall like a brain-dead buffalo. |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, Donna. He's not talking about you. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I can't believe what we have to work with here. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | A coughing, epileptic, brain-dead vegetable whore. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | If only... |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | ...if only Joe Biden was a woman. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | We could elect the first woman president.. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | who isn't a raging psychotic felon. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | What difference, at this point, does it make? |
